I've drawn a line in the sand. I'll tip (and tip well!) for traditionally tipped jobs, like waiter, bellhop, barber, barrista, bartender, etc. The hundred new things that corporations are begging for? Hell no. Absolutely not.
I will not tip at a drive-through oil change service.
I will not tip at a fast food counter.
I certainly will not tip at a convenience store.
Every single new tipping situation is a company begging me to subsidize their employees' wages instead of increasing them. Screw that. I'm not participating, and they can't make me. Those existing jobs were grandfathered in: waiters make below minimum wage on the expectation they'll make it up in tips, and that's f'ed up, but I can't change that by myself and I'm not going to stiff someone making sub-minimum to prove a point. All the others? Those cheapskate bosses can get bent. Pay more if you want to keep good help. Don't literally beg me to donate money to your employees as a charity.
I've drastically reduced my tips. I'm done with this system in the USA where they are allowed to advertise price X, but you're expected to pay X+Y, where Y might be a fee or a % of X.
And the way the system is trying to sneak it in everywhere more and more makes me revolt even more.
Last time I was in a restaurant and I tried to pay with the QR code thing it suggested I paid 20% tip on top of the total + tax. Tip is supposed to go on the part before tax. Sneaking it in makes it so that the people working there think they get paid better, without the employers paying their fair share.
It should be on the employer to ensure that (s)he is properly remunerated for the work (s)he does, not the customer who has no insight in that contract.
Because Maria works so damn hard cleaning those hotel rooms, and if I take a stand on principle and don't leave her a tip when I check out, the only ones who will suffer for it are her and her kids. Should I instead write her a note about how we're helping society improve?
I don't think thats the problem. Moreso something like this that was intended to help people that needed it is being taken advantage of. Every cafe with $6 espressos will ask you for a tip nowadays. What's worse is that a lot of places default to adding a 15% tip when these screens show! And there is no way of knowing where these tips are going unless you pay cash.
Do you not work hard for your money? Do you not market your skills to the highest bidder? Why do you have agency but Maria can't be expected to?
Hotel cleaning staff are harder to find than you think. If Maria is made or broken based on your $2, she can find a job that pays better. You enabling her through a system of random rewards may actually hold her hostage in a bad situation.
No, she can’t. Cleaning staff ware not hard to find. Cleaning jobs for fair wages are. Our economy works because we negotiate the cheapest labor we can for the highest output. Tech isn’t even different. We give options to people in lieu of cash on the hopeful promise that we’re gonna blow up and be work silly money. When was the last time you worked an unskilled labor job?
It's literally one of the least racist possible names, having origins in Hebrew, then moving to Greek and Latin. You'll find 'Maria' as a name in most European languages, even non-Romance languages acquired it from Christianity.
Pretty racist of you to think you can tell a person's race by their name. What race is Maria? Racial profiling by name is even more despicable than doing it by skin color, you racist.
You don't tip because you are stingy as long as the minimum wage has not increased to the point where these people could live of it. (Hint: they currently can't.)
Because the minimum wage under US law for a tipped job is $2.13/hour and most find it socially and morally problematic to deny that person their primary source of income.
To break the cycle, we need to force all employers to pay their employees a living wage.
Maybe where you’re at, people working a job can afford to live. Imagine if you lived in a society where a waitress relies on tips to pay for their children’s doctors appointments.
Last time I visited Miami Beach, I found out they have a forced 20% gratuity at restaurants. And still ask for a tip on top that. My friends and I were likely tipping >40% for subpar service and overpriced drinks for a few days until someone noticed it on their receipt.
No way. I routinely tip 20%, rounded up. If the place has a mandatory tip, I add max(0, 20-[service change]) to make up the difference between that and 20%. If it's 10%, I'll add 10% more. If it's 20%, I'll add 0. If it's 25%, I'll leave a bed Yelp review and never go back.
When restaurant food was cheap, tipping wasn't a big deal, especially before the trend of paying for your food first at the counter. A $10 meal and a $2 tip for a waiter/waitress that took care of you - not really bad.
Today, that same meal is $35 - $40 and wages haven't kept up for most, so not only does the tip have to increase, but people are also just eating out less. Lately it seems restaurants are closing left and right. So I think restuarant tipping as a percentage of all tipping is probably really on the decline
What's sort of come up in its place over the past few decades is the payment system asking you for a tip before you even get your food. I think there is a backlash against that, as well as tipping in non-food places. I'm seeing more and more Instagram posts about it.
WTF? A $10 to $40 jump? I haven't seen that anywhere around here, and I don't live in a cheap county, either. This is 100% about where you live and eat. This is not normal at all.
It’s a Lose for the employees of the current system. You’re cheekily superiorly saving a few bucks on a cause that isn’t going to be helped by snubbing a servicing worker.
There are a few tip free restaurants around, it’s sort of rare. Tipping at basically every random shop is out of control nowadays tho.
To formalize what other comments are saying, the current state is a Nash (dis-)equilibrium: no consumer can gain more by changing their own strategy if we hold all other consumer's strategies fixed.
Basically if you individually don't tip you're just hurting someone who's underpaid by the tipping culture system. I agree if _everyone_ stopped tipping simultaneously the system would become untenable and have to change, but it would be pretty painful for the workers involved in the interim.
Perhaps the only individual in the game who does have a positive incentive is the business owner, where going tip-free can gain a good rep among customers and get more business if viewed as ethical and stably priced. I've seen this grow a bit more common in California restaurants but it's certainly still rare. Most business owners would rather just participate in the dis-equilibrium and coast off the shadow subsidy.
Can someone even be underpaid by tipping culture? To my knowledge every tipped position has a federal fallback on the minimum wage, and untipped positions receive tips as bonuses on top of their hourly/salary wage.
Like, a waiter may start at $2.25/hr, and if they work for say 20 hours that week and get $150 in tips, for an effective wage of $9.75/hr, they’re above fed min wage. However if they only get $50 in tips? Now they’re at $4.75/hr, and their employer is federally required to supply the remaining $50, on top of whatever the state may require.
That’s not my experience at all, as a European who frequently travels to the US for work. If anything, I’d say that restaurants in the US are slightly more expensive without tips, definitely more expensive with.
> I’d say that restaurants in the US are slightly more expensive without tips
That's entirely possible, but then again people make far more in the U.S., so the cost of living is generally higher. Taking that into account, I don't think the cost of eating out is higher than in Europe.
My experience is that European restaurants are cheaper and better. Especially in 2026 with the Trump inflation hellscape. Everything from McDonalds to local high end restaurants.
Certain commodities are even more shocking. You’ll get the best loaf of bread that you ever had. in France, Spain, or Italy for two euro. In most American cities, unless there happens to be a functional local bakery, you’re looking at a seven dollar defrosted loaf of bread at a supermarket that tastes like cardboard.
I think many Americans feel a moral obligation to tip when asked, and when presented with the opportunity it suddenly becomes a decision between spending a few bucks or wondering if you won't be welcome to come back next time.
It can be insulting to be considered "cheap" and that's the label you might gain if you stop tipping.
We've heard from waitstaff and restaurants for decades that this is part of their income.
I think the only way this changes is through regulation or a seismic shift in this mentality causing people to stop tipping, resulting in waitstaff retention issues, resulting in restaurant owners paying better.
I wish the "morality gun" would point back at those who ask to be tipped, the same way a beggar who asks if you have some spare some change is castigated (in most places)
If I lived in that utopia (/s), I'd go around with a labelmaker to print out the prices of menu items when 15% (is that enough, or still cheap) is included, and stick them next to the prices on the menu.
Heck, someone should vibe code a mobile browser extension to do that for online menues...
You aren't in the right for being "openly angry" at a customer who doesn't voluntarily pay an optional tip. Either raise the prices and pay your servers more, or shut the fuck up about it (the angry people, I mean).
Not tipping your waiter is a dick move. A bad tip for bad service is one thing. No tip is just antisocial. You're not "sticking it to the man" by being a jerk.
I'm not trying to "stick it to the man" or imply the server is bad at their job. I'm paying the agreed upon price. If servers need to be paid more to do their job they can demand more in wages, and the prices can raise to account for that.
It's not in any practical sense optional. Refusing to tip is stiffing service staff on their compensation. That's the arrangement, at least in table service restaurants. If you're not comfortable with that, don't patronize those businesses.
In any sense optional? What about the literal sense? If you're not comfortable with _that_ arrangement, stop making it optional.
The only people stiffing service staff on their compensation is their employer shrugging their shoulders and not pricing the server's labour correctly. Your compensation agreement is between you and your employer, I'm here to pay for goods/services in exchange for the amount of money that we agreed on.
It's just not really my problem, and getting openly angry at me means you're the asshole, sorry.
You can tell yourself that as much as you want, but there is a decent chance staff will confront you about this on the way out the door, and nobody in the restaurant watching that happen is going to think staff are the assholes.
Tips are part of the compensation structure for front of the house staff. You are ethically obligated to tip.
Try to have some self esteem. If you don't feel like you can stand up for yourself feel free to give them a 100% tip or whatever, maybe they'll cheer for you as you leave. Perhaps other people watching will join in.
Again, your compensation is between you and your employer. If I don't tip, perhaps your employer should be paying you more. Raise the prices to account for this.
The only reasonable stand is to advocate for living wages but we’ll never do that in numbers strong enough for it to happen. Tipping has gotten out of hand but so has the cost of living.
A slightly more sensible minimum wage of $18/hr in Ontario has made it comfortable for me to avoid the most ridiculous tipping like fast food workers at Starbucks or when I pick up my own pizza. But I’m still happy to tip servers, cleaners, mohels, hairdressers, or anyone who could make me look ridiculous, really.
Because then you’re just being a dick. It would have to happen some other way, like regulation, or enough establishments explicitly banning tips and then demonstrating increased profit as a result.
I’m visiting Austin tx and was in a restaurant last night. On the menu it said party of 4 means automatic 20% tip added plus a 4% “administrative fee”. So 24% tip automatically added to the bill. Fortunately only had two people with me. They got zero from me.
It’s hard to stop because it means denying a dollar or two to a human in front of you who wants it and tried to earn it during your transaction. It’s not immoral, just less than ideal, so it’s endured.
You do not ethically have the option of not tipping in an American restaurant. If it's table service and they don't specifically say not to tip, you either tip or don't dine there. Tipping is part of the compensation structure for the front of the house. Refusing to tip is ethically comparable to wage theft.
I just hate corner stores and take out places expecting tips. I flat out refuse to do that. Please tip only for real service and sit down restaurants, thank you.
Tip, don't tip, do what you like. Not everything needs to be regulated by social standards. Feel like tipping? Do it. Don't? Then don't. Pretty simple.
It's a tradition, it's how the system works, why would you change that.
That said, I feel like sometimes this is pushed with those tablets with tipping options that present 20% 30% and 35%. Especially in situations where you self serve by going up to the clerk, as a non american it feels like I'm being scammed by a tourist trap, I might press 30% out of feeling that it's customary, but then an American might know the actual rules and either tip 15%, or not tip at all since it isn't customary to tip for self service.
We should bring back the tradition of child marriage and cutting off hands for stealing a loaf of bread
...wtf kind of argument is "this how it been so it is how it will be"
This forum has no room to argue it's a different kind of place.
Now that software is a dead end career cause AI HN is the same old blue collar Main Street dogma and tribal gibberish of any old typical bulletin board
If you're rich enough to consider an extra 20% on a meal "marginal" then good for you. I am too, at this point in my life.
But we need to recognize that as a privilege. For most people (including me, ten years ago) that's absolutely not marginal. Most people are having to budget and count their money carefully even at amounts you are privileged do dismiss as having no relevance.
Having the privilege of wealth is fine, up to a point. Being so wrapped up in it that you don't recognize it as a privilege is not fine.
Mainly because it makes you look like a tremendous douchebag and does immediate harm to real employees for an intangible cause that looks like grandstanding. I say this as a person who hates tipping but mechanically leaves 20%.
I have no problem tipping for service. Tipping when I pay in advance and get no service beyond being handed my food — what exactly am I tipping for? I don’t think people are opposed to tipping in general, it’s just been applied to everything.
One time I was forced to pay a tip for self checkout at the Austin airport. I was in a rush for my flight, it prompted, and I could not find any way to opt out.
You are tipping because of an arrangement in America whereby you share the costs of table service with management. That arrangement was originally designed to solve a principal-agent problem, but it hardly matters whether that problem exists today.
It's a collective action problem, a massive scale prisoner's dilemma where if everyone cooperated we could be in a better world but that just sweetens the social rewards for those who turn traitor and keep paying the tip. And if we collectively do not hit the "tipping point" and force employers to pay better then the employees just suffer. And in the mean time I enjoy a meal that is cheaper than the market can bear because the whole system is propped up by this system of cost misdirection that I have sidestepped. So I am getting an unfairly cheap meal.
> I've read lots of articles about how Americans hate their tipping culture.
You misunderstand.
There is tipping in restaurants, and then tipping in other places where it's much more traditional to not tip.
While some people don't like restaurant tipping, it's generally the other type of tipping the ruffles feathers. But in those cases, you don't have to tip.
> But tipping is optional
Again, you don't understand. No, tipping is not always optional. It's known and part of the bill in certain circumstances and this is known ahead of time.
> If you don't tip you both help society improve
I don't know, having been to European and American restaurants, I find the American restaurants to be far better at service. Couple that with free refills and other amenities (like again... actually good service), I wouldn't see it as better.
If the waiter interrupts you when you don't need anything, it's bad service. If the waiter is not there when you need something, it's bad service. American restaurants tend to err too much in one direction and European restaurants in the other. It's up to you to choose which way you prefer.
I personally prefer going to restaurants when I'm in Europe and using delivery in the US.
What would be examples of the tip
being part of the bill?
For me, if it IS on the bill it's a service fee and not a tip. If it's not on the bill, it's technically optional by definition regardless of social norms that'd make it practically mandatory.
Tips in America are not gratuities. Tips in America are wages. If you do not understand or accept that tips are wages, then you will not cooperate with tipping culture here.
Our federal administration recently decreed no tax on overtime, no tax on tips. This is a judicious move; although it unfortunately enshrines tipping even more firmly, it gives relief to the rank-and-file worker.
Generally, employees raking in cash tips always faced a tax-time dilemma: record and report all my tips from my job, and be taxed on them? Or just let it all slide under the table. Surely, nearly everyone does it. So, "no tax on tips" simply encourages you to report them without being docked for it.
Tipping culture is business-friendly. It gives business the opportunity to hire more workers for more hours, and simply offload the wages onto the customers. End-stage capitalism's finest hour.
As I mentioned earlier, tips in advance for services like food delivery? Those are bribes, not tips. They're also wages, but they're also bribes. It's fairly disgusting. I hate tipping. But I hate stiffing workers, and I personally enjoy a reputation as someone who cares about tipping people for services provided.
That being said, I encounter rampant “tip cheating” in my everyday life. In my state, there are businesses authorized to solicit tips, and the rest are not authorized to do so. However, a common sight on the countertop is a clear glass jar with cutesy decorations on it. They are not allowed to write “TIPS” on this jar, so you will see many creative turns of phrase. But, they are illicitly soliciting tips from you in the silence.
Ethical employees of ethical companies generally are discouraged from allowing customers to slip cash into their pockets. They do not want to get this kind of custom started when they are not authorized to accept gratuities. But it seems perfectly normalized to silently and passively solicit gifts from fake tip jars. The ubiquitous “take/leave a penny” tray is exactly the same low-grade tip cheating in convenience stores. So beware of this practice. If it is incorporated into their P.O.S. flow, I would expect it’s legitimate.
I've drawn a line in the sand. I'll tip (and tip well!) for traditionally tipped jobs, like waiter, bellhop, barber, barrista, bartender, etc. The hundred new things that corporations are begging for? Hell no. Absolutely not.
I will not tip at a drive-through oil change service.
I will not tip at a fast food counter.
I certainly will not tip at a convenience store.
Every single new tipping situation is a company begging me to subsidize their employees' wages instead of increasing them. Screw that. I'm not participating, and they can't make me. Those existing jobs were grandfathered in: waiters make below minimum wage on the expectation they'll make it up in tips, and that's f'ed up, but I can't change that by myself and I'm not going to stiff someone making sub-minimum to prove a point. All the others? Those cheapskate bosses can get bent. Pay more if you want to keep good help. Don't literally beg me to donate money to your employees as a charity.
I've drastically reduced my tips. I'm done with this system in the USA where they are allowed to advertise price X, but you're expected to pay X+Y, where Y might be a fee or a % of X.
And the way the system is trying to sneak it in everywhere more and more makes me revolt even more.
Last time I was in a restaurant and I tried to pay with the QR code thing it suggested I paid 20% tip on top of the total + tax. Tip is supposed to go on the part before tax. Sneaking it in makes it so that the people working there think they get paid better, without the employers paying their fair share.
It should be on the employer to ensure that (s)he is properly remunerated for the work (s)he does, not the customer who has no insight in that contract.
Because Maria works so damn hard cleaning those hotel rooms, and if I take a stand on principle and don't leave her a tip when I check out, the only ones who will suffer for it are her and her kids. Should I instead write her a note about how we're helping society improve?
I don't think thats the problem. Moreso something like this that was intended to help people that needed it is being taken advantage of. Every cafe with $6 espressos will ask you for a tip nowadays. What's worse is that a lot of places default to adding a 15% tip when these screens show! And there is no way of knowing where these tips are going unless you pay cash.
What's even worse is when on presenting the check the waitress tells you 18% tip already included.
I've seen it normalized for parties of 6 or greater...but not for any party size until recently.
I find that completely wild. If that's the case it should be posted and announced prior to anything taking place.
Incidentally it was the worst service I had ever gotten in a very long time, presumably because it didn't matter at all
Do you not work hard for your money? Do you not market your skills to the highest bidder? Why do you have agency but Maria can't be expected to?
Hotel cleaning staff are harder to find than you think. If Maria is made or broken based on your $2, she can find a job that pays better. You enabling her through a system of random rewards may actually hold her hostage in a bad situation.
No, she can’t. Cleaning staff ware not hard to find. Cleaning jobs for fair wages are. Our economy works because we negotiate the cheapest labor we can for the highest output. Tech isn’t even different. We give options to people in lieu of cash on the hopeful promise that we’re gonna blow up and be work silly money. When was the last time you worked an unskilled labor job?
> Because Maria..
Don’t be racist
It's literally one of the least racist possible names, having origins in Hebrew, then moving to Greek and Latin. You'll find 'Maria' as a name in most European languages, even non-Romance languages acquired it from Christianity.
Pretty racist of you to think you can tell a person's race by their name. What race is Maria? Racial profiling by name is even more despicable than doing it by skin color, you racist.
You don't tip because you are stingy as long as the minimum wage has not increased to the point where these people could live of it. (Hint: they currently can't.)
Because the minimum wage under US law for a tipped job is $2.13/hour and most find it socially and morally problematic to deny that person their primary source of income.
To break the cycle, we need to force all employers to pay their employees a living wage.
Maybe where you’re at, people working a job can afford to live. Imagine if you lived in a society where a waitress relies on tips to pay for their children’s doctors appointments.
Last time I visited Miami Beach, I found out they have a forced 20% gratuity at restaurants. And still ask for a tip on top that. My friends and I were likely tipping >40% for subpar service and overpriced drinks for a few days until someone noticed it on their receipt.
No way. I routinely tip 20%, rounded up. If the place has a mandatory tip, I add max(0, 20-[service change]) to make up the difference between that and 20%. If it's 10%, I'll add 10% more. If it's 20%, I'll add 0. If it's 25%, I'll leave a bed Yelp review and never go back.
When restaurant food was cheap, tipping wasn't a big deal, especially before the trend of paying for your food first at the counter. A $10 meal and a $2 tip for a waiter/waitress that took care of you - not really bad.
Today, that same meal is $35 - $40 and wages haven't kept up for most, so not only does the tip have to increase, but people are also just eating out less. Lately it seems restaurants are closing left and right. So I think restuarant tipping as a percentage of all tipping is probably really on the decline
What's sort of come up in its place over the past few decades is the payment system asking you for a tip before you even get your food. I think there is a backlash against that, as well as tipping in non-food places. I'm seeing more and more Instagram posts about it.
> Today, that same meal is $35 - $40
WTF? A $10 to $40 jump? I haven't seen that anywhere around here, and I don't live in a cheap county, either. This is 100% about where you live and eat. This is not normal at all.
It's absolutely normal in most of the USA. Inflation in the last decade has been outlandish.
Been to Taco Bell lately?
It’s a Lose for the employees of the current system. You’re cheekily superiorly saving a few bucks on a cause that isn’t going to be helped by snubbing a servicing worker.
There are a few tip free restaurants around, it’s sort of rare. Tipping at basically every random shop is out of control nowadays tho.
To formalize what other comments are saying, the current state is a Nash (dis-)equilibrium: no consumer can gain more by changing their own strategy if we hold all other consumer's strategies fixed.
Basically if you individually don't tip you're just hurting someone who's underpaid by the tipping culture system. I agree if _everyone_ stopped tipping simultaneously the system would become untenable and have to change, but it would be pretty painful for the workers involved in the interim.
Perhaps the only individual in the game who does have a positive incentive is the business owner, where going tip-free can gain a good rep among customers and get more business if viewed as ethical and stably priced. I've seen this grow a bit more common in California restaurants but it's certainly still rare. Most business owners would rather just participate in the dis-equilibrium and coast off the shadow subsidy.
Can someone even be underpaid by tipping culture? To my knowledge every tipped position has a federal fallback on the minimum wage, and untipped positions receive tips as bonuses on top of their hourly/salary wage.
Like, a waiter may start at $2.25/hr, and if they work for say 20 hours that week and get $150 in tips, for an effective wage of $9.75/hr, they’re above fed min wage. However if they only get $50 in tips? Now they’re at $4.75/hr, and their employer is federally required to supply the remaining $50, on top of whatever the state may require.
In the US, restaurants are comparatively cheaper than say Europe who then pay their employees more.
Americans would riot if restaurants raised the prices to offset the loss of tipping.
That’s not my experience at all, as a European who frequently travels to the US for work. If anything, I’d say that restaurants in the US are slightly more expensive without tips, definitely more expensive with.
> I’d say that restaurants in the US are slightly more expensive without tips
That's entirely possible, but then again people make far more in the U.S., so the cost of living is generally higher. Taking that into account, I don't think the cost of eating out is higher than in Europe.
Having lived in an expensive European country and in several different US states, that wasn’t my experience.
Even when factoring in things like tipping and taxes being included in the prices, I would say In aggregate US restaurants are simply more expensive.
LOL where?
My experience is that European restaurants are cheaper and better. Especially in 2026 with the Trump inflation hellscape. Everything from McDonalds to local high end restaurants.
Certain commodities are even more shocking. You’ll get the best loaf of bread that you ever had. in France, Spain, or Italy for two euro. In most American cities, unless there happens to be a functional local bakery, you’re looking at a seven dollar defrosted loaf of bread at a supermarket that tastes like cardboard.
I think many Americans feel a moral obligation to tip when asked, and when presented with the opportunity it suddenly becomes a decision between spending a few bucks or wondering if you won't be welcome to come back next time.
It can be insulting to be considered "cheap" and that's the label you might gain if you stop tipping.
We've heard from waitstaff and restaurants for decades that this is part of their income.
I think the only way this changes is through regulation or a seismic shift in this mentality causing people to stop tipping, resulting in waitstaff retention issues, resulting in restaurant owners paying better.
I wish the "morality gun" would point back at those who ask to be tipped, the same way a beggar who asks if you have some spare some change is castigated (in most places)
You are more than considered "cheap" if you don't tip in a table service restaurant; people will get openly angry at you, and they'll be right.
If I lived in that utopia (/s), I'd go around with a labelmaker to print out the prices of menu items when 15% (is that enough, or still cheap) is included, and stick them next to the prices on the menu.
Heck, someone should vibe code a mobile browser extension to do that for online menues...
You aren't in the right for being "openly angry" at a customer who doesn't voluntarily pay an optional tip. Either raise the prices and pay your servers more, or shut the fuck up about it (the angry people, I mean).
Not tipping your waiter is a dick move. A bad tip for bad service is one thing. No tip is just antisocial. You're not "sticking it to the man" by being a jerk.
I'm not trying to "stick it to the man" or imply the server is bad at their job. I'm paying the agreed upon price. If servers need to be paid more to do their job they can demand more in wages, and the prices can raise to account for that.
It's not in any practical sense optional. Refusing to tip is stiffing service staff on their compensation. That's the arrangement, at least in table service restaurants. If you're not comfortable with that, don't patronize those businesses.
In any sense optional? What about the literal sense? If you're not comfortable with _that_ arrangement, stop making it optional.
The only people stiffing service staff on their compensation is their employer shrugging their shoulders and not pricing the server's labour correctly. Your compensation agreement is between you and your employer, I'm here to pay for goods/services in exchange for the amount of money that we agreed on.
It's just not really my problem, and getting openly angry at me means you're the asshole, sorry.
You can tell yourself that as much as you want, but there is a decent chance staff will confront you about this on the way out the door, and nobody in the restaurant watching that happen is going to think staff are the assholes.
Tips are part of the compensation structure for front of the house staff. You are ethically obligated to tip.
Try to have some self esteem. If you don't feel like you can stand up for yourself feel free to give them a 100% tip or whatever, maybe they'll cheer for you as you leave. Perhaps other people watching will join in.
Again, your compensation is between you and your employer. If I don't tip, perhaps your employer should be paying you more. Raise the prices to account for this.
The only reasonable stand is to advocate for living wages but we’ll never do that in numbers strong enough for it to happen. Tipping has gotten out of hand but so has the cost of living.
A slightly more sensible minimum wage of $18/hr in Ontario has made it comfortable for me to avoid the most ridiculous tipping like fast food workers at Starbucks or when I pick up my own pizza. But I’m still happy to tip servers, cleaners, mohels, hairdressers, or anyone who could make me look ridiculous, really.
Because then you’re just being a dick. It would have to happen some other way, like regulation, or enough establishments explicitly banning tips and then demonstrating increased profit as a result.
Won’t ever succeed one person at a time.
I’m visiting Austin tx and was in a restaurant last night. On the menu it said party of 4 means automatic 20% tip added plus a 4% “administrative fee”. So 24% tip automatically added to the bill. Fortunately only had two people with me. They got zero from me.
It’s hard to stop because it means denying a dollar or two to a human in front of you who wants it and tried to earn it during your transaction. It’s not immoral, just less than ideal, so it’s endured.
We live in the real world so individual principles don't make as much of a difference to your community as leaving a decent tip.
Covid workers really made many Americans feel guilty about tipping more and it never reset.
> If you don't tip you both help society improve and you save money
How would it help society?
You do not ethically have the option of not tipping in an American restaurant. If it's table service and they don't specifically say not to tip, you either tip or don't dine there. Tipping is part of the compensation structure for the front of the house. Refusing to tip is ethically comparable to wage theft.
Personally I’d prefer to just have the gratuity automatically added to the bill because it gets rid of the awkwardness of compulsory charity.
But refusing to tip just hurts people at the bottom of the ladder and doesn’t do anything about the billionaires stealing from all of us.
I just hate corner stores and take out places expecting tips. I flat out refuse to do that. Please tip only for real service and sit down restaurants, thank you.
Tip, don't tip, do what you like. Not everything needs to be regulated by social standards. Feel like tipping? Do it. Don't? Then don't. Pretty simple.
We may be reaching a tipping point.
It's a tradition, it's how the system works, why would you change that.
That said, I feel like sometimes this is pushed with those tablets with tipping options that present 20% 30% and 35%. Especially in situations where you self serve by going up to the clerk, as a non american it feels like I'm being scammed by a tourist trap, I might press 30% out of feeling that it's customary, but then an American might know the actual rules and either tip 15%, or not tip at all since it isn't customary to tip for self service.
We should bring back the tradition of child marriage and cutting off hands for stealing a loaf of bread
...wtf kind of argument is "this how it been so it is how it will be"
This forum has no room to argue it's a different kind of place.
Now that software is a dead end career cause AI HN is the same old blue collar Main Street dogma and tribal gibberish of any old typical bulletin board
Because it’s only marginally more expensive
If you're rich enough to consider an extra 20% on a meal "marginal" then good for you. I am too, at this point in my life.
But we need to recognize that as a privilege. For most people (including me, ten years ago) that's absolutely not marginal. Most people are having to budget and count their money carefully even at amounts you are privileged do dismiss as having no relevance.
Having the privilege of wealth is fine, up to a point. Being so wrapped up in it that you don't recognize it as a privilege is not fine.
Where I come from tipping means rounding up to the next round sensible number. That is marginally more expensive.
15% to 20% as customary in the US is anything but "marginally more expensive".
it doesn't look good
"It's going to ask you a question"
Mainly because it makes you look like a tremendous douchebag and does immediate harm to real employees for an intangible cause that looks like grandstanding. I say this as a person who hates tipping but mechanically leaves 20%.
I have no problem tipping for service. Tipping when I pay in advance and get no service beyond being handed my food — what exactly am I tipping for? I don’t think people are opposed to tipping in general, it’s just been applied to everything.
One time I was forced to pay a tip for self checkout at the Austin airport. I was in a rush for my flight, it prompted, and I could not find any way to opt out.
You are tipping because of an arrangement in America whereby you share the costs of table service with management. That arrangement was originally designed to solve a principal-agent problem, but it hardly matters whether that problem exists today.
Tipping in a drive thru or countertop is a different conversation from a sit down restaurant as far as I'm concerned.
> I say this as a person who hates tipping but mechanically leaves 20%
Thereby perpetuating cheap skate owners can continue to get away with labor exploitation and wage theft
You know the olds that put this social way in our heads are dead or too old to force our hand anymore
No need to continue to kowtow like an abused spouse; grandpas hand can barely lift a glass of water
It's a collective action problem, a massive scale prisoner's dilemma where if everyone cooperated we could be in a better world but that just sweetens the social rewards for those who turn traitor and keep paying the tip. And if we collectively do not hit the "tipping point" and force employers to pay better then the employees just suffer. And in the mean time I enjoy a meal that is cheaper than the market can bear because the whole system is propped up by this system of cost misdirection that I have sidestepped. So I am getting an unfairly cheap meal.
No one is worried about Grandpa's opinion here.
Because the economy is so busted that the least we can do is treat our servers a little better than their employers do.
> I've read lots of articles about how Americans hate their tipping culture.
You misunderstand.
There is tipping in restaurants, and then tipping in other places where it's much more traditional to not tip.
While some people don't like restaurant tipping, it's generally the other type of tipping the ruffles feathers. But in those cases, you don't have to tip.
> But tipping is optional
Again, you don't understand. No, tipping is not always optional. It's known and part of the bill in certain circumstances and this is known ahead of time.
> If you don't tip you both help society improve
I don't know, having been to European and American restaurants, I find the American restaurants to be far better at service. Couple that with free refills and other amenities (like again... actually good service), I wouldn't see it as better.
If the waiter interrupts you when you don't need anything, it's bad service. If the waiter is not there when you need something, it's bad service. American restaurants tend to err too much in one direction and European restaurants in the other. It's up to you to choose which way you prefer.
I personally prefer going to restaurants when I'm in Europe and using delivery in the US.
I'm unfamiliar with US tipping culture.
What would be examples of those "other places"?
What would be examples of the tip being part of the bill?
For me, if it IS on the bill it's a service fee and not a tip. If it's not on the bill, it's technically optional by definition regardless of social norms that'd make it practically mandatory.
Restaurants will usually add an automatic 15-20% gratuity (automatic tip) for large parties, usually 8 or more.
Tips in America are not gratuities. Tips in America are wages. If you do not understand or accept that tips are wages, then you will not cooperate with tipping culture here.
Our federal administration recently decreed no tax on overtime, no tax on tips. This is a judicious move; although it unfortunately enshrines tipping even more firmly, it gives relief to the rank-and-file worker.
Generally, employees raking in cash tips always faced a tax-time dilemma: record and report all my tips from my job, and be taxed on them? Or just let it all slide under the table. Surely, nearly everyone does it. So, "no tax on tips" simply encourages you to report them without being docked for it.
Tipping culture is business-friendly. It gives business the opportunity to hire more workers for more hours, and simply offload the wages onto the customers. End-stage capitalism's finest hour.
As I mentioned earlier, tips in advance for services like food delivery? Those are bribes, not tips. They're also wages, but they're also bribes. It's fairly disgusting. I hate tipping. But I hate stiffing workers, and I personally enjoy a reputation as someone who cares about tipping people for services provided.
That being said, I encounter rampant “tip cheating” in my everyday life. In my state, there are businesses authorized to solicit tips, and the rest are not authorized to do so. However, a common sight on the countertop is a clear glass jar with cutesy decorations on it. They are not allowed to write “TIPS” on this jar, so you will see many creative turns of phrase. But, they are illicitly soliciting tips from you in the silence.
Ethical employees of ethical companies generally are discouraged from allowing customers to slip cash into their pockets. They do not want to get this kind of custom started when they are not authorized to accept gratuities. But it seems perfectly normalized to silently and passively solicit gifts from fake tip jars. The ubiquitous “take/leave a penny” tray is exactly the same low-grade tip cheating in convenience stores. So beware of this practice. If it is incorporated into their P.O.S. flow, I would expect it’s legitimate.
Tax free wages smell very much like deeply ingrained and publicly acceptable corruption. But it's America so it must be okay.